RESENT, APPRECIATED & REGRETED.

Resentment is running through my veins as I continue to think of the betrayal of what I thought was a good friend and once business partner.   I resent that I was a driving force in company but when I began to stumble with sickness it easier to cast me aside than it was to help me.   I resent that I gave more dedication and time to my company and career than I did to my young children and wife.   I resent that I am still fighting daily headaches and that I thought when I was told that I had a job for life that meant regardless.   I resent that I build the company from what was a trust fund hobby to a multimillion dollar company and then someone else gains the benefit.   I resent greed, selfishness, and liars.

I appreciate that I was given the opportunity to prove myself right out of college. That I was given the freedom and time to learn my profession, that I was able to make a very respectful income during the second half of my career which gave my family security.    I appreciated the people I worked with, specially the office help and installers.  They often were overlooked, ignored, and did not get their share of recognition.  I appreciated that I was given much lead way in creating and developing a successful, low budget marketing campaign.   That I further was able to instill my beliefs of quality and value on the company and its services.     Now realizing that I paid deeply with my health and that all my skills and efforts were often not acknowledged.  I truly was appreciative of all the customers, friends, and clients that I helped over the years. The relationships I developed with Realtors, Agents, and custom home builders.    I hope they know I was truly not selling them but trying to help them get the peace of mind and quality that they had asked for, being very grateful that many of them paid me the highest complement and repeated business with me over twenty plus years.

 

I regret that I was so blinded by my loyalty and trust that I did not want to see how misuse.  Not to mention that I regret that staff and installers were taken advantage of while others continued to perform poorly.   It is very regretful that I did not speak when the company continued to hire or even rehired people that were not qualified or that had behavior that was not becoming of a good business.   I regret that I that I thought I was family and not just an instrument of the corporation. Much like a battered wife, I was the last to see the truth.   I regret that I did speak up when management frequently lied to customers and employees both. I still think it is important to be truthful and honest.   I regret that when ownership went behind my back, taking a very hard worked client, that I did not run from the building to start my own company.   If I had not stood up and battled back I might still have my job today.   I now realize it is not always best to battle and not always best to bring the flaws of management to the owners attention.   You see, sometimes the owner does not want to know.  It is much easier to ignore than it is to take a proactive approach.  I regret that I left income behind when I was fired.  That I gave up the battle to gain peace.   Consumed with disbelief and poor health I thought everything would work out.   I regret that I took a man’s word and handshake as a binding contract.

I say these things now not to be vengeful or mean. In fact, I believe there is no need for me to be vengeful.  Since those who did wrong will someday gets what they deserve without me lifting a finger.   It is my sacred belief that what goes around does come around.    My story is unfortunately, yet it is not uncommon in the world of greed and corporate America and though we I cannot change the world by telling our story just maybe someone will benefit from hearing it. I do hope that others will learn from it and hopefully avoid the same outcome.  I close with the Serenity Prayer.   “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the COURAGE to change the things I can, and the WISDOM to know the difference.”